Lately my hands have been itching a lot more than they should. I have been posting a lot more on Facebook than I ought to. I actually THOUGHT of my Twitter account, which has only ever served the purpose of easy celebrity stalking. (Can you believe the celebrity I stalk the most is Lucy Hale? That girl would definitely be my best friend if we knew each other in real life. She is almost as weird as Yashwi which is saying a lot if you know Yashwi.) But I knew matters were very serious when the thought of a journal crossed my mind. All of this could only mean one thing.
It meant that I hadn't written anything in a long long time.
My last post dates back to December 2013 for crying out loud. I am obviously not counting the endless WhatsApp and Facebook Messenger conversations my mom would more than happily vouch for.
Anyway, let's get to insanely happy things. I am pretty sure I was pulled back into the literary world because all my literary dreams have come true! (Okay they have started to. Baby steps.) I got into Shaheed Bhagat Singh College, Delhi University in English Honors. ENGLISH HONORS!!!!! ENGGGLIIIISSSSHHHH HONOOOORRRRSSSS. It is only what I have wanted since I had enough sense to know what I want. And get this, I read the course structure online and the first thing we will read is Pride and Prejudice. Um, does the fact that I will get to read my favorite classic in the beginning of college year point out that I am in fact on the right direction in life? Obviously yes.
And I am insanely in love with Dilli. (Dilli sounds more beautiful than Delhi doesn't it? I feel it captures the unique beauty of the city effectively. Delhi sounds too catty.) I met this journalist in the train and she gave me some beautiful advice (which I think is why God made us cross paths. What difference did I make in her life.. I wonder.) She told me Dilli is the best place on earth if you follow her rules. If Dilli asks you to beware of idiots, beware. If Dilli asks you to get back home by 10, get back home by 10. Do whatever the hell you want, but stay inside the frame. I can be all idealistic and go "why can't I roam around when boys do it all the time?" but it is tantamount to venturing into a jungle without weapons, a jungle full of terribly dangerous animals. And that is exactly what people capable of hurting others are. Terribly dangerous animals. They are not boys, they are not human. Come on, they are unable to control their desires in the face of bare flesh. They even proudly admit to it (We only rape you cause you show us your skin) Excuse me? Not. Human.
In case you are wondering, not all of it was her. She gave the Dilli and rules thing, but as you might have noticed I have this habit of rambling on. Anyway it struck a chord somewhere and this is one rule I plan on following. (At least for now. I cannot say what I will do when my friends go clubbing at night. Pepper spray!!!! Wait. Did this nullify the entire paragraph?)
Also, I am at a point in my life where the only thing worse than staying at home is leaving and the only thing worse than leaving is staying at home. I can't leave home but I can't stay here. How the fuck do people do it? Hundreds of thousands of people do it every year. Hell, people I know closely are doing it. How? I shudder to think of the moment when I leave here, knowing that I am leaving. Frustratingly, I also shudder to think of a scenario where I abandon all this, get into BHU, and realize I will be stuck here for another five years.
Is this how it is supposed to feel? Such contradicting problems that there is just no solution.
I am hoping I find my way soon, very soon, like everyone apparently does.
It meant that I hadn't written anything in a long long time.
My last post dates back to December 2013 for crying out loud. I am obviously not counting the endless WhatsApp and Facebook Messenger conversations my mom would more than happily vouch for.
Anyway, let's get to insanely happy things. I am pretty sure I was pulled back into the literary world because all my literary dreams have come true! (Okay they have started to. Baby steps.) I got into Shaheed Bhagat Singh College, Delhi University in English Honors. ENGLISH HONORS!!!!! ENGGGLIIIISSSSHHHH HONOOOORRRRSSSS. It is only what I have wanted since I had enough sense to know what I want. And get this, I read the course structure online and the first thing we will read is Pride and Prejudice. Um, does the fact that I will get to read my favorite classic in the beginning of college year point out that I am in fact on the right direction in life? Obviously yes.
And I am insanely in love with Dilli. (Dilli sounds more beautiful than Delhi doesn't it? I feel it captures the unique beauty of the city effectively. Delhi sounds too catty.) I met this journalist in the train and she gave me some beautiful advice (which I think is why God made us cross paths. What difference did I make in her life.. I wonder.) She told me Dilli is the best place on earth if you follow her rules. If Dilli asks you to beware of idiots, beware. If Dilli asks you to get back home by 10, get back home by 10. Do whatever the hell you want, but stay inside the frame. I can be all idealistic and go "why can't I roam around when boys do it all the time?" but it is tantamount to venturing into a jungle without weapons, a jungle full of terribly dangerous animals. And that is exactly what people capable of hurting others are. Terribly dangerous animals. They are not boys, they are not human. Come on, they are unable to control their desires in the face of bare flesh. They even proudly admit to it (We only rape you cause you show us your skin) Excuse me? Not. Human.
In case you are wondering, not all of it was her. She gave the Dilli and rules thing, but as you might have noticed I have this habit of rambling on. Anyway it struck a chord somewhere and this is one rule I plan on following. (At least for now. I cannot say what I will do when my friends go clubbing at night. Pepper spray!!!! Wait. Did this nullify the entire paragraph?)
Also, I am at a point in my life where the only thing worse than staying at home is leaving and the only thing worse than leaving is staying at home. I can't leave home but I can't stay here. How the fuck do people do it? Hundreds of thousands of people do it every year. Hell, people I know closely are doing it. How? I shudder to think of the moment when I leave here, knowing that I am leaving. Frustratingly, I also shudder to think of a scenario where I abandon all this, get into BHU, and realize I will be stuck here for another five years.
Is this how it is supposed to feel? Such contradicting problems that there is just no solution.
I am hoping I find my way soon, very soon, like everyone apparently does.
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